Most of you reading this right now read my articles on a regular basis and are aware of my philosophy of becoming friends before lovers. If you aren?t aware of my stance on friendship, here are two articles to read that will give you the foundation?
?The One Relationship Mistake You Don?t Know You?re Making? .
In many cases, if a man can?t be a friend to a woman he certainly can?t be anything romantic. For me, friendship is the foundation of a great relationship and love. Far too often people jump from relationship to relationship seeking a feeling, but they are truly operating out of lust. There is a lot that goes into a relationship, but the foundation has to be friendship. However, today I want to address the reason why men may not desire to be your friend.
I do realize some of the reasons I am about to share may seem judgmental or unfair; however, some of them will be common sense.
1. Questionable past with men.?Many men are quick to judge women for their past, because secretly men like the fun girls. However, when he is ready to settle down he wants nothing to do with the woman who drinks, clubs, or anything else that reminds him of his player past. However, this doesn?t mean you should lie about your past, because the right man will understand and love you regardless.
2. On the other hand, if you are a woman who is ?practicing abstinence??and the guy has casual sex intentions, he will not want to be your friend if it won?t lead to sex (which is strictly his intention). As I always say, the character of a man matters more than anything else he brings to the table. So, a guy like this who doesn?t want to be your friend is a good thing.
3. You use the words ?let?s start as friends.??For some men this is code speech for ?I am not interested in anything, but a friendship?. Ladies, allow the man to set the pace and learn to maintain healthy relationships without getting emotionally involved too soon. If he truly desires something real with you, he will seek a friendship with you. If he wants to have something more down the road, the friendship will allow both to know if it?s possible or even a wise move.
4. The way you act or behave in public.?If a man has a hard time seeing you as classy, sophisticated, stylish, and graceful it will be hard for him to pursue even a casual friendship with you.
I remember, about three years ago or more, I was out with a female friend celebrating a new job. Little did I know, she was so loud and completely without manners. In every other situation I shared with her, she was always the model lady. I guess in restaurants and after a few glasses of wine, she changes. I still remained her friend even after feeling embarrassed.
5. You major in pushing men away and having shallow relationships.?A man wants to know you have strength, meaning he can be flawed and your love doesn?t change. Nothing scares a man more than knowing, if he fails or something happens, the woman he loves will walk away from him. You can be a ride or die lady without losing yourself.
I?m glad you read this far, because it means you?ve learned a lot of good information that will help you when put it into practice.?